World Champions!

6 02 2012

It’s hard to imagine a more anticlimactic game-winning touchdown run with :57 seconds remaining in the Super Bowl than the one Ahmad Bradshaw scored last night. On a second-and-goal from the six yard line, Bradshaw took the hand-off from Eli Manning and ran directly up the middle of a gaping hole in the Patriots defensive line. Shocked by this clear path to the end zone, it took a few seconds before Bradshaw suddenly remembered what he had to do, but it was a few seconds too late. Just inside the one yard line, Bradshaw squatted as if he was shrinking away from an imaginary tackler, hearing Eli yelling for him not to score. The momentum of his run was too much to fight though, and it carried him over the goal line, backwards, almost as if he were moving in slow motion.

And just like that, the New York Giants led the New England Patriots 21-17 with :57 seconds left in Super Bowl XLVI and we didn’t know whether to celebrate or be disappointed. So, by default, we celebrated — even if the reaction was a little delayed. After all, wouldn’t it be better to force the immortal Tom Brady to go the length of the field and score a touchdown to win, rather than relying on Tynes to boot a high-pressure kick and then give Brady the ball back needing only a field goal to win?

The decision will be debated, for sure, but not as much as it would have been if the outcome of the game was any different than what it ultimately was. As it were, Brady’s last second Hail Mary pass ended up hitting the turf  just out of the reach of Rob Gronkowski’s fingers and scooted out the back of the end zone, and then — cue the confetti, for the second time in four years.

It’s still far too early for me to accurately put this Super Bowl run and eventual title in the proper perspective, but I can say this much: this one seemed more deserved, like we really earned it, at least more so than 2007. Although 2007 was special for me in its own way (it was the first Giants title that I was old enough to appreciate, we ruined the Pats’ perfect season, etc.), my immediate feeling is that I will come to cherish this victory even more when I look back on it years from now.

To compare the two would be foolish at this moment, before the initial wave of euphoria from last night’s victory has even worn off. If I could put it simply though, I would say that when it comes down to it the 2007 title felt like it was a series of serendipitous events that carried us like a team of destiny, whereas this run felt like we scratched, clawed and fought to the death every step of the way, catching fire at the right time and straight-up beating the best teams in football in the rawest, most pure way possible.

And maybe there are other factors in there somewhere too. Maybe it’s because of the fact that this run seemingly came out of nowhere. Maybe it’s because of the fact that every single win in this six-game stretch dating back to Christmas Eve against the Jets has felt like one big sigh of relief after another. Or maybe it’s because of the fact that I already have such fond memories surrounding each and every playoff game that made up this run. From being there in MetLife Stadium to witness the first home playoff win in the new building against Atlanta, to the improbable win over the 15-1 Packers, to watching us capture the NFC title on a beach in St. Maarten, and finally watching Big Blue wrap up another Super Bowl title in the last minute with my Dad, the only other Giants fan I know more diehard than I am, every step of the way was memorable.

A few years from now, I’ll probably be able to better assess the two Super Bowl runs and how they compare to one another, but right now, I’ll just stick to enjoying this one.

So soak it all in, Giants fans. After the season we just went through, that might very well have taken a few years off of my life, we sure as hell deserve it.





Super Bowl XLVI: New York Giants vs. New England Patriots Position-By-Position Breakdown

30 01 2012

There are about 155 hours left until the kickoff of Super Bowl XLVI, or three viewings of The Tree of Life if you want a rough comparison. The Patriots have already landed in Indianapolis and the Giants are due to arrive today, so in celebration of the official beginning of Super Bowl Week, I’m going to do a position-by-position breakdown of the big game. But before you read all the way through to the bottom expecting to find my prediction, I want to warn you that you’re not going to find it. If you think I’m going to be pressured into giving a prediction that I’ll regret all week, then you must be outside of your mind. It’s not happening.

Quarterback: Eli Manning vs. Tom Brady

If this breakdown was comparing how Eli Manning and Tom Brady played last week, then the outcome might be a little different. If it was comparing which quarterback was hottest at this very moment, then the outcome would definitely be different. But if we’re just comparing Eli Manning and Tom Brady straight-up, with no stipulations, then it’s hard not to tip the scales in Brady’s favor. I know Eli has won his last two games against Tom and I know he’s probably playing the best football of his life right now, but the fact is that Tom Brady is still Tom Brady, official UGG’s spokesman, until further notice. The fact that this is even as close as it is speaks volumes to how well Eli Manning is playing right now. I’ll leave it at that.

Slight Edge: Pats

Running Backs: Brandon Jacobs, Ahmad Bradshaw vs. BenJarvus Green-Ellis, Danny Woodhead

If this category was “Which running back tandem has the best names” then I’d have to give it to the Patriots. BenJarvus Green-Ellis almost has half as many names as he had rushing touchdowns during the regular season and Danny Woodhead sounds like a comic book character. But if we’re comparing them based on which tandem is more likely to swing the momentum of the game, it’s going to have to be Brandon Jacobs and Ahmad Bradshaw. Bradshaw is the heart of the Giants offense, even if his numbers may not always show it. He didn’t play the last time the Giants and Pats met back in Week 9 and the Giants still came out on top, so having him around this time should be a big plus for Big Blue. And if Brandon Jacobs can break a few big runs, the Patriots defense will have major problems.

Edge: Giants

Wide Receivers: Hakeem Nicks, Victor Cruz, Mario Manningham vs. Wes Welker, Deion Branch, Chad Ochocinco

Right now, the Giants have the best wide receiving corps in the NFL and it isn’t even close. Each and every one of those three have had a significant impact on the Giants’ postseason run and they are a major reason why the Giants are going to be playing for the Lombardi Trophy on Sunday night. Nicks had enormous games against Atlanta and Green Bay, and when he was locked down against San Francisco, it was Victor Cruz that stepped up with 10 catches for 142 yards. And what about Mario Manningham? Well, he has only quietly scored 3 touchdowns this postseason, one in each game so far. His 3rd-and-15 catch against San Fran to put the Giants up 17-14 was one of the biggest plays of the season.

As for the Patriots receivers, we all know that Welker has had a monster season. Although the New England receivers are the exact polar opposite of the Giants’ squad in that they are more prone to controlling the middle of the field and not known for their big-play tendencies the way Nicks, Cruz and Manningham are, they are still dangerous and equally hard to cover in the 10-20 yard range. Plus, Ochocinco just bought a pair of Beats by Dre headphones for every single player on the Patriots which is probably the most important thing he’s contributed all year.

Edge: Giants

Offensive Line: Chris Snee, David Diehl, Kareem McKenzie, David Baas vs. Matt Light, Logan Mankins, Nate Solder

These two units are going to play an extremely important role in Sunday’s game. If the Patriots offensive line can protect Brady and make sure he isn’t running scared and throwing darts into the ground like Alex Smith during the 4th quarter last week, then the Pats should be in good shape. We all know what can happen if the Giants get pressure on Brady. We saw it in Super Bowl XLII and we saw it in Week 9. This is no secret. For the Giants, their line was simply abused by the 49ers defensive front last week. Manning was hit so many times he could have legally changed his name to Tina Turner. Luckily for the Giants’ line, the Patriots pass rush isn’t nearly as ferocious as San Francisco’s. For now though, and since the play of the Patriots’ line is much more closely connected to their success than the Giants’ line is, I’m going to give the edge to New England.

Edge: Pats

Tight Ends: Jake Ballard, Travis Beckum vs. Rob Gronkowski, Aaron Hernandez

Much like the wide receiver match-up, this one isn’t even close. Only instead of being in the Giants’ favor, this one clearly goes to New England. Jake Ballard can hold his own with just about anyone in the league and has had a great season filling the shoes of the departed Kevin Boss, but he’s leagues away from Rob Gronkowski and Aaron Hernandez. Gronkowski shattered tight end records left and right this season and even on a bad ankle, he’s the player that the Giants defense needs to make its number one priority going into Sunday night. His high ankle sprain is going to be the big story leading up to the game and it’s not likely that Gronk will be 100%, but Rob Gronkowski at 75% is still more dangerous than 90% of the tight ends in the league playing at full health. Plus, Aaron Hernandez plays like a wide receiver and the Pats have even started using him as a running back too because apparently their offense is run by a 12-year-old playing Madden.

Edge: Pats

Defensive Line: Justin Tuck, Osi Umenyiora, Jason Pierre-Paul, Chris Canty, Linval Joseph vs. Shaun Ellis, Vince Wilfork, Mark Anderson

This unit is the Giants’ bread and butter. They will set the tone of this game and it’s up to the Patriots offensive line to keep them at bay, which will be easier said than done considering no offensive line has been able to successfully do that in over a month and a half. The Giants’ defensive line is a very close-knit group and they have big game experience too. Tuck and Umenyiora both played huge roles in the Super Bowl XLII victory and Tuck sacked Brady twice in that game. In fact, if it wasn’t for Eli Manning’s late game heroics, an argument could have been made to give Tuck the MVP of that game. Simply put, this game will be determined by how much pressure the Giants’ front four can put on Brady.

As for the Patriots, Wilfork had an enormous game against Baltimore last week, and it will be up to the Giants’ offensive line to keep him at bay on Sunday. If it was legal for defensive tackles to eat their way through the offensive line though, Wilfork would be absolutely unstoppable.

Edge: Giants

Linebackers: Michael Boley, Mathias Kiwanuka, Jacquian Williams, Chase Blackburn vs. Brandon Spikes, Rob Ninkovich, Tracy White

This is a tough category to call because the Giants linebackers have been really hit-or-miss all season. Only in the last five weeks have they begun to really gel and play some quality football. Jacquian Williams is finally making plays, Boley and Kiwanuka are finally both 100% healthy and Chase Blackburn went from eating Cheetos on his couch two months ago to playing a major role in another Giants Super Bowl run. It’s weird how football works. The linebackers are going to really be tested on Sunday with Gronk and Hernandez roaming the middle of the field. If they can cover and not let either tight end go all Vernon Davis on them, then they will severely limit the Patriots’ offensive options.

Slight Edge: Giants

Secondary: Kenny Phillips, Corey Webster, Aaron Ross, Deon Grant, Antrel Rolle vs. Devin McCourty, Kyle Arrington, Pat Chung, James Ihedigbo, Sterling Moore

I have to give the edge to the Giants here on principle. The Patriots owned the league’s worst passing defense all season, and even though they’ve looked a little better during the playoffs, you need to remember who they went up against the last two weeks: Tim Tebow and Joe Flacco. Two quarterbacks who aren’t exactly known for lighting it up. The most dangerous receiver they’ve had to cover was probably Demaryius Thomas. Let’s get real here for a second. They haven’t had to face a receiving corps like the one the Giants have since the last time they played the Giants. Plus, if they throw Julian Edelman out there on Cruz or Manningham it’s going to be a blood bath. The one thing the Patriots’ secondary has in its favor is that it’s opportunistic. They get a lot of takeaways, so as long as Eli can play mistake-free football and be careful with his throws like he was last week in San Francisco, then the Giants can avoid playing to the Patriots’ strengths.

Edge: Giants

Special Teams: Lawrence Tynes, Steve Weatherford, Will Blackmon, Devin Thomas vs. Stephen Gostkowski, Zoltan Mesko, Julian Edelman, Wes Welker

The Giants special teams play is probably what won the game for them against the 49ers. Weatherford punted the hell out of the ball all night, Thomas’s two fumble recoveries were responsible for 10 points and he might have singlehandedly put the Giants in the Super Bowl and of course Lawrence Tynes was the one who won it with his kick. But the truth is that Big Blue’s special teams have been shaky all season. Another game like last week’s is probably asking too much, but all they really need to do is play smart, mistake-free football. On the Pats’ side, Gostkowski is a model of efficiency and Edelman and Welker are always dangerous in the return game. We’ll call this one even.

Edge: Even

Head Coach: Coughlin vs. Belichick

For the second time in four years, Tom Coughlin has coached himself off of the hot seat and into the Super Bowl. He’s done a fantastic job of getting the team motivated and prepared down the stretch this season and especially in the playoffs and he’s converted guys like Antrel Rolle and Michael Boley and made them believers. In fact, he might be doing the best coaching job of his career right now. But so is Belichick. He’s taken a team with the 31st ranked defense in the league and brought them within one win of a Super Bowl title, which is amazing given the fact that he has based his entire career up until now on his defensive superiority. Basically this comes down to the fact that Belichick is Belichick — the slight edge here goes to the Pats, even though, much like the Manning-Brady comparison, this is much closer than it would have been a few years ago.

Slight Edge: Pats

 

Prediction: No way.





NFL Week 13: Things I Know*

5 12 2011

*I don’t actually know anything. This is all purely conjecture, and probably inaccurate conjecture at that.

It’s almost playoff time! Teams are getting ready to make that final push for those precious few playoff spots, Christmas trees are going up in living rooms all over the country and the Giants defensive coordinator is openly questioning the effort of his players!

In other words, it’s December. As you may or may not know, December is also my favorite time for pretending that I know A LOT about the NFL. It’s not too hard to imagine, after all I do watch close to 200 hours of NFL-related programming from the months of August to February. So yeah, I should know A LOT about the NFL. After watching a full day of football yesterday, here is what I learned:

*I’m only going to say a few things about yesterday’s Giants loss because, honestly, there isn’t too much to say. It was an interesting game, it was a competitive game, but at the end of the day it turned out exactly how I thought it would turn out: with a loss. This is the NFL, not the BCS. There are no “good losses” or “bad losses.” There are just losses. Yesterday’s game was a loss, no matter how you choose to look at it. And no matter how you choose to look at it, it all boils down to the fact that, for the second time in the last three weeks, we lost a game that was very winnable in the fourth quarter because our defense couldn’t come up with a stop when it needed to.

Once again, Eli Manning walked off the field late in the fourth quarter with the game tied and needed the defense to come up with just one big play, just as he did in the game against Philly. And once again, the defense folded. Fifty-eight seconds later it was Crosby’s kick sailing through the uprights, and the Packers are 12-0. No style points, no moral victories, no “nice try.” Just our fourth-straight loss and an ENORMOUS game against the Cowboys next Sunday night with first place and our season on the line. Oh and by the way, our defense has given up 87 points in the last two games. I know we played Drew Brees and Aaron Rodgers, who could probably put up 40 points on the ’85 Bears, but I’m still not happy with our defensive play.

*The 2011 Better Late Than Never award goes to Titans running back Chris Johnson. CJ spent the first ten weeks of the NFL season Dexter-ing my fantasy football team, and I somehow was able to win despite his disappearing act. But in the last few weeks, with the fantasy playoffs drawing closer, he finally woke up and rejuvenated not only my fantasy team, but the Tennessee Titans playoff hopes as well. At 7-5, the Titans are still very much alive in the AFC South, despite the fact that I’m still not sure if Matt Hasselbeck has broken the 200-yard mark all season.

*At one point this season, the Buffalo Bills were 4-1. Remember that?

*My sincerest condolences go out to anyone who watched all 60 minutes of yesterday’s Bears-Chiefs game. I hope you make a full recovery.

*If the Dolphins’ season started on November 6th, they’d be 4-1 while outscoring their opponents 140-53 in the process. Let’s just say that nobody wants to be playing the Miami Dolphins right now with their playoff lives on the line. Luckily, we got them out of the way at the very beginning of their mini-hot streak, or else I could absolutely see Matt Moore throwing for 425 yards against us.

*I’m not even going to attempt to understand how Tim Tebow does what he does. The topic has been beaten into the ground already, and I think at this point we can all pretty much agree that he has something special. It’s something that regular football metrics can’t really quantify, but it’s there and it’s pretty obvious at this point. A 6-1 record, five comeback wins, and a nation of believers. If you don’t get it by now, you probably never will. Next week Denver gets a depleted Bears team at home, without Cutler or Forte? Can we be looking at an 8-5 Broncos team going into what will now be a HIGHLY anticipated Dec. 18 game against the Patriots? Possibly. Tebow vs. Brady? I can’t wait.

*Dan Orlovsky started 10 games for the 2008 Detroit Lions. This means that he has a chance to be the starting quarterback for the only two teams in NFL history to go 0-16. That is, if the Colts can finish off their impressive feat. I’m not sure that is a distinction that Dan Orlovsky wants to be recognized for.

*The Houston Texans are 9-3 despite the fact that they have lost their top two quarterbacks to season-ending injuries and were without Andre Johnson for six weeks (and maybe more after he re-injured his hamstring yesterday). The Titans are creeping up on them in the AFC South, but luckily they get a Bengals team that’s lost three out of its last four games next week, followed by the Panthers and Colts.

*The Cowboys are not as good as everyone seems to think they are. I’ve been saying this all season, and I’m going to stick with it after their 19-13 overtime loss to the Cardinals yesterday. There is not a single aspect of their overall game that impresses me. Of course, we still have to beat them twice in the next four games. But….

*….If you don’t think the Giants are going to run the table in the next four games, then face the 17-0 Packers in the NFC Championship game and beat them, you’re clearly out of your mind.





NFL Thoughts: Just the Usual Insanity

3 10 2011

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I don’t have a clue what to make of this young NFL season. We’re four weeks in and, as usual, I’m stumped. But that’s how you know it’s good. When you wake up on a Monday morning a little confused and a little excited and also a little scared, that means that the National Football League is doing its damn job.

At the conclusion of Week 4 (save for tonight’s Indy-Tampa Bay game that I don’t think more than 6 people are actually going to watch), there are a handful of surprises and not-surprises. Since paragraphs are for the weak, I’m going to give you a run-down of my scattered and sometimes incomplete thoughts in bullet form because it’s 2011 and the American public has an extremely short attention span.

*The Detroit Lions are 4-0 and everybody claims to have seen this coming. I’m sorry, I don’t know where I was when the Lions bandwagon filled to capacity and pulled out of the station, but I wasn’t notified. For some reason, nobody seems to really be shocked that the Lions are 4-0 and that Calvin Johnson is grabbing touchdowns out of the air left and right with ease like he just crashed an 8-year-old’s birthday party. I mean, the man is on pace for 32 TOUCHDOWN CATCHES for God’s sake. I know that everybody is talking about them and that they’re the Cinderella team du jour, but everybody is talking about them like they knew this was coming. Listen, I’m not oblivious, I know the Lions have a very talented team, but I thought that at the end of the day, they’re still the Lions. They straight-up embarrassed the Dallas Cowboys yesterday. Embarrassed them.

*Calvin Johnson. Again. He’s making NFL defenses look so stupid right now. I mean, how many teams can say that on a first-and-goal at the 2, they can just have their QB chuck a jump ball up into the back of the end zone and have a guaranteed touchdown 9 out of 10 times? Come on.

*Dallas Cowboys blowing late-game leads like it’s their job/Dream Team looking nightmarish. Tony Romo threw away a 24-10 4th quarter lead against the Jets in Week 1 and then threw away a 27-3 lead to the Lions yesterday. And when I saw “threw away” I literally mean that he threw the ball directly into the hands of the opposing team, multiple times. I mean that he literally threw two consecutive Pick 6′s yesterday. The Cowboys’ meltdown yesterday was matched only by the slow-motion train wreck that is the Philadelphia “Dream Team” Eagles. Not only did they blow a 23-3 lead to the San Francisco 32nds (that’s their NFL ranking for total offense) but they also managed to put a hex on the Philadelphia Phillies who went ahead and blew a 4-run lead of their own in Game 2 of the NLDS last night. Impressive! The Eagles are now 1-3, meaning that they now have a 14% chance of making the playoffs, according to the last 21 years of NFL history. Chalk this one up under the “Not Surprised” category though, thanks to the man standing on their sidelines wearing the headset and parachute pants.

*Rules don’t apply to Victor Cruz because Victor Cruz makes the rules. Couldn’t have been more baffled by the Victor Cruz non-fumble call last night, but also couldn’t have been more ecstatic about it either. Once you actually read the rule that the officials were referring to, it makes a little more sense, but I still couldn’t help but get flashbacks of Eli diving crumpling to the ground untouched against the Eagles last year and losing the ball. Anyway, we’re 3-1 and how do you like that Jets fans?

*Oh by the way, Eli Manning is only quietly having one of the best 4-week stretches of his career. No big deal. Remember when the season started and everyone was all like “I know he threw for 4,000 yards and 31 touchdowns last year and has a Super Bowl MVP to his name, but he totally sucks the big one!” Then the Giants stunk up the joint in Week 1 and everybody was all like “I told you!” And then what does Easy do? Just rolls off three straight wins, with two of them being come-from-behind wins on the road where the Giants trailed in the 4th quarter. No biggie. He only completes 32-of-40 passes for 415 yards, 4 TDs and no INTs in the second half of the last three games. Ho hum. Only third in the NFL in QB rating behind those other bums Aaron Rodgers and Tom Brady. You go do your thing, Easy. Let the haters hate.

*A little confused about the Cam Newton pants-wetting ceremony. For the fourth straight week, Cam Newton has every NFL analyst in America wearing diapers, and that’s completely justifiable because after all he’s led the Panthers to a shocking….1-3 record? But he throws for so many yards though! I don’t get it.

*The New York Jets are what we thought they were. Completely overrated and offensively inept. Mark Sanchez just keeps flinging the ball around like it’s covered in spiders and he’s afraid to hold it, and Jets fans are alright with blaming it all on the fact that Nick Mangold is out of the lineup because he’s the reason that two of their top three wide receivers are a combined 117 years old.

*Meanwhile, the Vikings can’t beat anybody, not even a team that can’t beat anybody. Going into this one, I was completely convinced that the Kansas City Chiefs were far and away the worst team in the National Football League. Now, I’m completely convinced that the title has to go to the Vikings. Just horrendous football. I can’t believe I actually wrote this column about Donovan McNabb a few years ago. I can’t even defend the guy anymore. Hang it up Donovan, please.

*Wes Welker is living the dream. Do you realize the kinds of numbers that Wes Welker is putting up right now? A 5’9″ white guy hasn’t cleaned up like this since Scott Baio and Tony Danza dominated the primetime sitcom game. 40 receptions and 616 yards and it’s only Week 4. This guy is on pace to rack up 160 catches, almost 2,500 yards receiving and 20 touchdowns. Unheard of. He probably won’t end up with numbers that outrageous, but if he does they should not only give him the MVP, they should rename it The Wes.

*Chris Johnson. It’s nice of you to stop impersonating an old wooden bench and resume your job as an NFL running back, but let’s try to maybe get into the end zone next week. How about it?

Overrated list: Atlanta Falcons, Oakland Raiders, Buffalo Bills, Washington Redskins (I know, they shouldn’t count), New York Jets, Dallas Cowboys

Uh Oh List: Philadelphia Eagles, Pittsburgh Steelers

Underrated List: Houston Texans, Tennessee Titans

Jury is still out on these teams: Baltimore Ravens, New England Patriots, New Orleans Saints, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, New York Giants, Chicago Bears

They are as good as we thought: Green Bay Packers

Nauseatingly bad: Miami Dolphins, Minnesota Vikings, Kansas City Chiefs, Jacksonville Jaguars, St. Louis Rams

 

 





NFL Week 2 Picks: Return of the Picks

15 09 2011

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Well, it’s that time of year again. I apologize for missing out on the Week 1 picks. I’m usually fashionably late to most things, and that includes the NFL season, but I felt a lot better about it after watching Sunday’s Giants game because at least I know that they showed up late to the season as well.

But, the picks have returned and so has the fantasy football season and I can now go back to doing what I do best: making myself look like I know absolutely nothing about a league I have watched obsessively since I was 5 years old.

Here is where I stop talking about the picks and start making them. As per the usual, home teams in all CAPS and let the fun begin.

Chicago (+7) over NEW ORLEANS

I don’t think I was the only one that expected a massive hangover from Jay Cutler to start the season after what happened in last year’s NFC championship game and the fact that he broke up with Kristin Cavallari (by the way, I’m referring to a hangover in both the figurative and literal sense). But, he proved us all wrong last week with a convincing win over an Atlanta team that is just a tad overrated. The Saints are the Saints, we know that already.

Kansas City (+8.5) over DETROIT

I’m as excited about the new Detroit Lions as anybody else is. I have Matthew Stafford and Calvin Johnson on my fantasy teams. But I’m not yet 8.5-point-favorites excited. The Chiefs played last week like they thought the preseason was extended to 5 games and nobody had the heart to tell them that it was their home opener. Not even the fans.

Jacksonville (+9.5) over NY JETS

If you’re noticing a trend, it’s because I’m not sold enough on anyone this early in the season (except maybe Green Bay and New England) to be backing them as 9-point favorites. Especially not the way the Jets defense looked for most of the game against Dallas and especially not since the Jaguars have been notoriously victimizing the Jets at the Meadowlands for years now. Look it up.

Oakland (+3) over BUFFALO

The underdog streak continues! I think Oakland’s win over Denver on Monday night was less of an aberration than Buffalo’s blow-out win over Kansas City. Why? I don’t have a clue. At least I’m honest.

WASHINGTON (-3.5) over Arizona

Last week Rex Grossman made his first NFL start in 5 years. As we all know, the Giants have an extensive history of making quarterbacks that are either making their first start in a long time, or their first start ever, look really, really good. If you don’t believe me, just take a look back to 2007 against Washington and the immortal Todd Collins. That night, he made his first start in a decade — yes, a DECADE — and beat the Giants 22-10. But enough about the Giants. This paragraph is about the Redskins and the Cardinals and about how I couldn’t care less about either team. Kevin Kolb is 1-0!

Baltimore (-6) over TENNESSEE

It’s been a while since I’ve seen a team operate in full-on “F-YOU MODE” like the Baltimore Ravens did on Sunday. Faking the extra point and running it in for a two-point conversion when you’re already up by 20? F YOU PITTSBURGH. And then, Tom Brady took it up a notch one night later and went into complete Madden 12 mode against the Dolphins.

PITTSBURGH (-14) over Seattle

Oh Tarvaris Jackson! You’re such a nightmare, such an indefatigable QB plague, that your team is 14 point underdogs in Week 2 to a team that got blasted the week before! You are going to make so much money for a nation of compulsive gamblers this year! DO YOU EVEN REALIZE HOW IMPORTANT YOU ARE?

Green Bay (-9.5) over CAROLINA

Not this time, Cam. Sorry. You might throw for 422 yards in a losing effort when you’re playing a pass defense as porous as Arizona’s, but not against Green Bay. “WELCOME TO THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE, CAM NEWTON.” – Clay Matthews.

Tampa Bay (+3) over MINNESOTA

The Vikings should make things fun and open up the quarterback position for their home opener this week. Hold a contest, pick four winners and have each of them play quarterback for the Vikings for one quarter a piece. The person that can throw for more than 39 yards against an NFL defense and beat Donovan McNabb’s Week 1 total, wins season tickets for life. If all four people can do it, then sign one of them.

Cleveland (-2) over INDIANAPOLIS

I knew that the time would eventually come when the Colts would be 2-point underdogs at home to the Cleveland Browns, I just had no clue it would be this soon. I wasn’t ready yet. R.I.P. Indianapolis Colts.

Dallas (-3) over SAN FRANCISCO

Although there’s always the strong possibility that with a lead late in the 4th quarter, Tony Romo will close his eyes and fling the ball directly into the hands of a San Francisco linebacker with a clear path to the end zone.

Houston (-3) over MIAMI

“This is the Texans’ year! Do you hear me? THIS IS IT! Seriously this time. No, really. They WILL make the playoffs this year. I’M TELLING YOU.” – Every NFL analyst.

NEW ENGLAND (-7) over San Diego

There’s absolutely no way that this won’t be one of those 48-41 games where both teams’ punters just stand on the sidelines with their arms awkwardly folded the entire game like they’re waiting for their wives to finish trying on shoes at Macy’s. Plus, it will be really fun for all the fans who are completely wasted from drinking (water) all day!

DENVER (-4) over Cincinnati

Will this finally be the week that Tim Tebow descends from the heavens to save/destroy Denver Broncos football? Probably not.

Philadelphia (-2.5) over ATLANTA

Michael Vick returns to Atlanta! Matty Ice gets booed at home! Cris Collinsworth makes an inappropriate joke! Faith Hill! It’s Sunday Night Football on NBC!

St. Louis (+5.5) over NY GIANTS

We can’t really lose at home to a Rams team that’s missing Steven Jackson, can we? (Don’t answer that.)

 

 





Not Quite Yet (and Week 6 Picks)

16 10 2010

Not yet. I’ve been repeating that over and over again. Every time I start to come up with an opening bit for this week’s column, I find myself getting a little too high on last week’s 34-10 win over Houston. That’s exactly what I don’t want to do, especially in Week 6 with the toughest part of our schedule still lingering on the horizon.

Make no mistake, last Sunday’s win at Reliant Stadium was pretty damn impressive. Coming on the heels of the defensive juggernaut that rolled over Chicago in Week 4, we all wondered if the much-maligned Giants defense had finally come back and come back for good. Last Sunday, it happened again.

We shut down Arian Foster, the number one running back in the league going into the game holding him to a measly 26 yards on 12 carries. Obviously it helped that our offense was able to mount an early 21-0 lead and force the Texans to abandon their running game, but we also succeeded in shutting down Schaub and just like that we have a convincing 34-10 win on the road and a three-way tie for first in the NFC East with Washington and Philadelphia.

Now, with 13 points allowed in the last two weeks, our defense has to do it again tomorrow against a Lions team that is somehow averaging like 72 points a game, even though I’m pretty sure their offensive game plan consists of having Shaun Hill/Matthew Stafford close his eyes and heave the ball in the air Brett Favre-style hoping that when he opens them again Calvin Johnson is sprinting towards the end zone. Surprisingly, this works more often than it should. Our defense needs to do it tomorrow, and then hopefully the week after that and then the week after that, and so on, you get the picture. Let’s take it one week at a time though. I’m excited, but I won’t let myself get too excited. Not quite yet.

One more thing before I get into this week’s picks: I want to give a quick shout-out to James Dolan and the wonderful people over at Cablevision. Tomorrow will be the first time this season that I won’t be in attendance for a Giants home game, and I won’t even have the luxury of watching it on my own television at home. So thanks for that, guys.

Home teams in caps:

San Diego (-8.5) over ST. LOUIS

How many times have the Chargers started 2-3 in the past five seasons? I feel like this happens every year, before they make a November-December run or the Broncos just collapse.

Kansas City (+4.5) over HOUSTON

Despite the fact that they lost 19-9 in Indianapolis last week, I’m still not putting down my Solo cup filled with Chiefs Kool-Aid yet. Give me another week.

NEW ENGLAND (-2.5) over Baltimore

Despite the fact that I really like Baltimore this season and I’m compelled to pick them, I feel like this is another one of those games where the Pats jump out to a 28-7 lead in the first half before anyone realizes what’s going on. Anytime your quarterback gets dissed by Justin Bieber in a rap song, you know that he’s coming out at full throttle the next time you take the field. A lot to play for here.

New Orleans (-4.5) over TAMPA BAY

Bill Simmons seems to think that “JOSH FREEMAN WINS FOOTBALL GAMES” and that might be so, but I’m not completely sold yet. Beat the Saints and take over first place in the NFC South and I might be sold, but right now I’m not buying anything yet. By the way, I’m liking my choice of picking Aaron Rodgers over Drew Brees for my fantasy team with every passing week, even though Aaron Rodgers might not know exactly where he is right now. He’ll be back next week though, no worries.

Atlanta (+2.5) over PHILADELPHIA

The Falcons might be the best team in the NFC right now, although that’s like saying Erin Andrews is the hottest women on the sidelines of a college football game; not too much competition.

Detroit (+10) over NY GIANTS

I hate picking the Giants for fear of The Jinx, and I really hate picking the Giants when they’re double digit favorites. However, if Calvin Johnson doesn’t play….

CHICAGO (-6) over Seattle

Because Aaron Rodgers is currently concussed, I’m starting Jay Cutler (formerly concussed) in fantasy tomorrow. Luckily, the Seahawks happen to have one of the worst passing defenses in the league, although that probably won’t matter tomorrow because fantasy football hates me. I should have picked up Caleb Hanie off of waivers.

GREEN BAY (-3) over Miami

Don’t ask me why the Packers are 3-point favorites on the road with half of their team on injured reserve (seriously, have you looked at their injury list? It’s like a shorter version of their opening day roster) and Matt Flynn starting at QB. The Packers need a win though. I mean, they really NEED a win.

PITTSBURGH (-14) over Cleveland

Big Ben is back tomorrow, which I’m excited about because it gives me the opportunity to look forward to 10 full weeks of inappropriate Ben Roethlisberger jokes.

DENVER (+3.5) over NY Jets

Thanks, but I’ll pass on this one.

SAN FRANCISCO (-7) over Oakland

The 49ers might be the best 0-5 team in NFL history. Either that, or they were just tremendously overrated going into this season, which is also highly possible. Anyway, it can’t be good for Alex Smith to hear 60,000 people chanting for David Carr. Still, I keep picking the Niners every week anyway just waiting for them to finally arrive. This is why I’m 12 games under .500 in picks this season.

MINNESOTA (-1.5) over Dallas

You don’t even know how much I would love to head into our Week 7 Monday night clash with the Cowboys at 1-4 and their season slowly circling the drain while Wade Phillips stands like a wax figure on the sidelines staring unblinkingly into space.

Indianapolis (-3) over WASHINGTON

Peyton Manning, night games, you know the deal.

Tennessee (-3) over JACKSONVILLE

The Titans are quietly a lot better than a lot of people realize yet.

Last Week: 7-7

Season Totals: 32-44





THE NFL SEASON IS NIGH

7 09 2010

Now that I’ve come out of hiding and I’m not forced to watch the Mets anymore, it’s time to get ready for the impending NFL season the only way I know how to – by making predictions that I know won’t even be close to right by the time we get to November and also by taking cheap shots at the Cowboys, Jets and basically every other team that isn’t the Giants. Well, the Giants and any team with one of the players from my fantasy squad.

So now, at the request of absolutely no one, here is my 2010 NFL Season Preview and Other Random Things That Are Related to The 2010 NFL Season.

* First things first: How bad is Matt Leinart exactly?  I mean, not only did they not want him to be their starting QB going into this season, but they didn’t even want him to stand on the sidelines and watch. That’s pretty embarrassing if you ask me. When a team drafts you 10th overall, hands you the reigns, takes them away the next season for an aging former MVP, promises you the starting job when he retires and then when he does retire, signs Derek Anderson to take your job…..you know you’re doing something wrong. Or maybe he doesn’t know. Either way, good luck in Houston, Matt Leinart. I hear they have a vibrant night life.

* TJ Houshmandzadeh to the Ravens. Houshmandzadeh, spellcheck’s worst nightmare, now joins Anquan Boldin and the ageless Derrick Mason on a suddenly supremely talented receiving corps in Baltimore. Just like that, Joe Flacco now has a bunch of weapons at his disposal and the Ravens look exponentially more dangerous than the already talented team that reached the AFC Divisional playoffs last season and are only two years removed from the AFC title game.

* Let’s stay in the AFC North and talk about Ben Roethlisberger. Commish Goodell has reduced his suspension from 6 games down to 4. Great for Ben. To offset that good news, the Steelers went ahead and stripped Roethlisberger of his status as team captain. It makes for an interesting situation now because “I’m the captain of the Pittsburgh Steelers” was his number one pick up line in bar bathrooms in Georgia.

* Tom Brady recently remarked that he was not watching this season of HBO’s Hard Knocks featuring the New York Jets because he, “hates the Jets”. Why is this noteworthy? Because so many players these days are afraid of admitting their hatred for other teams for the sake of remaining gracious and sportsmanlike and because “it’s the right thing to do”. Aside from the occasional trash-talking that takes place before big games, there isn’t a lot of bad blood left in the NFL anymore. To hear a clean-cut All-American boy like Tom Brady come out and announce his hatred for the Jets makes me believe that we’re not that far removed from the days when players weren’t compelled to produce generic responses to pregame and post-game questions along the lines of “We have such respect for this team. They’re a very talented team. They’re going to be tough to beat.” Thank you, Tom Brady.

* And since I mentioned Hard Knocks, allow me to say that Jets head ringmaster Rex Ryan is dangerously close to becoming a caricature of himself after only one season running the show. Listen Rex, you were 9-7 last year. I don’t know if you forgot about the fact that you were 6-7 at one point and just about everyone, including yourself was chalking up the season as a loss. I don’t know if you forgot about the fact that the Colts sat Peyton Manning at halftime in Week 16 pretty much allowing you guys to waltz into the playoffs, when you honestly had no business being there. I haven’t seen this much hype swirling around a team that was 9-7 the previous season in just about…forever. You made the AFC Championship game, great. You were winning at halftime in the AFC Championship game. Awesome. But I’ll say it now and then probably every week until the Jets start off 2-5: THEY DON’T GIVE OUT SUPER BOWL RINGS IN SEPTEMBER. Settle down guys.

* Congratulations to Revis Island, finally being able to reach an agreement with the Jets. He turned down a 4-year, $40 million deal over a month ago, claiming that he wanted more guaranteed money. He wanted at least $40 million guaranteed. That contract was not cutting it for “Revis Island”. He wanted to be the top paid CB in the league. He wanted Nnamdi Asomugha money. So he held out for 36 days. Then, he signed a contract for 4 years and $46 million, $32 million in guaranteed money. So glad you could work out a deal, Darrelle. You fought for 36 days to get $6 million more and fall $8 million short of the guaranteed money you wanted. I think instead of Hard Knocks, next year HBO should base a show around Darrelle Revis trying to negotiate with a car salesman. He would probably leave the dealership after paying $12 million for a Toyota Camry.

Okay, enough ranting. And I managed to stay away from making fun of Brett Favre again. Let’s get down to business with my patented,

AMAZINGLY ACCURATE PREDICTION TIME!

NFC East

1) Dallas Cowboys  11-5

2) New York Giants  10-6

3) Philadelphia Eagles 8-8

4) Washington Redskins 7-9

NFC North

1) Green Bay Packers  13-3

2) Chicago Bears  10-6

3) Minnesota Vikings 9-7

4) Detroit Lions  5-11

NFC South

1) New Orleans Saints  12-4

2) Atlanta Falcons  10-6

3) Carolina Panthers  8-8

4) Tampa Bay Buccaneers  3-13

NFC West

1) San Francisco 49ers  10-6

2) Arizona Cardinals  9-7

3) St. Louis Rams  7-9

4) Seattle Seahawks  6-10

AFC East

1) New England Patriots  12-4

2) New York Jets  9-7

3) Miami Dolphins  9-7

4) Buffalo Bills  7-9

AFC North

1) Baltimore Ravens  13-3

2) Cincinnati Bengals  11-5

3) Pittsburgh Steelers  10-6

4) Cleveland Browns  4-12

AFC South

1) Indianapolis Colts  12-4

2) Houston Texans  10-6

3) Tennessee Titans  8-8

4) Jacksonville Jaguars  5-11

AFC West

1) San Diego Chargers  10-6

2) Denver Broncos  10-6

3) Oakland Raiders  8-8

4) Kansas City Chiefs  7-9

Wild Card Playoffs

Cowboys over Falcons

Bears over 49ers

Colts over Texans

Bengals over Chargers

Divisional Playoffs

Packers over Bears

Saints over Cowboys

Ravens over Bengals

Patriots over Colts

NFC & AFC Championship

Packers over Saints

Ravens over Patriots

Super Bowl XLV

Green Bay Packers over Baltimore Ravens

There you go, now it’s on paper. Later today I’m going to rant again for another 2,000 words about last night’s Boise State-Virginia Tech game and how it pretty much solidified our need for a playoff system in college football, and then on Thursday I’m delivering my picks column for Week 1. Thanks for reading.





The Donovan McNabb Saga

29 03 2010

The relationship between Donovan McNabb and Philadelphia Eagles fans has always been an intriguing one. Which is to say that unless you are a Philadelphia Eagles fan, you’re not likely to ever fully understand it. Ever since Day One, I have witnessed what has perhaps become the most tumultuous relationship that a hugely popular “franchise player” has ever had with his franchise and his fan-base. From the day he was taken by the Eagles with the second overall pick in the 1999 NFL Draft, up until the day he will inevitably be traded to the Raiders or the Vikings or the Bills, the plight of Donovan McNabb will likely remain an enigma to most.

When the Eagles drafted Donovan McNabb out of Syracuse in the 1999 NFL Draft, he was booed heavily. The first thing Donovan McNabb heard when he stood next to Paul Tagliabue and held up a Philadelphia Eagles jersey for the first time, was a barrage of boo’s from the Philly faithful. How nice of them to welcome him so warmly. Although the Eagles were mired in a period in which they went through numerous second-rate starting quarterbacks, including but not limited to the likes of Bobby Hoying and Ty Detmer, Eagles fans still believed that drafting Ricky Williams was the direction that the franchise needed to take. In hindsight, was taking McNabb over Williams the right choice? Yes, of course it was. However, this doesn’t change the way most Philly fans feel about their franchise quarterback. Needless to say, the 1999 NFL Draft would be a harbinger of things to come over the next decade.

If nothing else, Donovan McNabb is certainly a polarizing figure in Philadelphia. Over the last 10 years, he has alternated between hero, villain and complete enigma more times than John Locke in the last 6 seasons of LOST and sometimes those transformations can take place over the course of a few weeks, a few days or even one quarter of a game. For someone who is been the star player and undisputable leader of a winning football team over the course of an entire decade, he has to lead the league for the most times his team has threatened to cut him, trade him or bench him.

It’s no surprise that he and Head Coach Andy Reid have clashed over the years, and while we can watch countless puff pieces on FOX pregame shows that portray the two as being best buddies, we all know the truth: Andy Reid doesn’t trust Donovan McNabb. Benching him in the second half of a regular-season game against Baltimore a few seasons ago was a heavily criticized move at the time, but it served to light a fire under McNabb, as he eventually led the Eagles to the NFC Championship later that season where they would lose to the Arizona Cardinals.

Which brings me to my next point: Donovan McNabb knows how to win. Now, here is where the gallery chimes in, in unison, with a resounding, “What has he won?” And the answer is: nothing substantial — yet. No, he hasn’t won a Super Bowl yet, but he’s been to one. Stats are stats, and this one clearly speaks for itself: since McNabb was drafted in 1999, he has led the Eagles to the playoffs 8 times. In that same time span, only one team (and one quarterback) has been to the playoffs more than McNabb and Philadelphia. That team? The Indianapolis Colts. Peyton Manning has one Super Bowl ring, and he’s made two appearances, but it took him 8 years to even make his first Super Bowl, while McNabb reached the big game in his 6th season. Am I comparing Donovan McNabb to Peyton Manning? No, all I’m saying is that over the last decade, not many quarterbacks have been as consistent as Donovan McNabb. His 9 wins in the playoffs are the third best among active quarterbacks behind only Tom Brady and Brett Favre.

Now I can throw stats around all day, but they don’t really do much. Almost every off-season for the last five or six years, Donovan McNabb’s name has been floated through the rumor mills and it’s almost become expected to hear writers and analysts wonder whether he’ll lose his starting job after a bad game in Week 5. With my brother being a diehard Eagles fan, and having watched McNabb and the Eagles almost every Sunday for as long as I can remember, this is something I’m typically used to.

Not to this degree though. This time, it seems like the Eagles organization is going out of their way to dangle McNabb out there in the open, leaving him available for any team that shows interest or makes an offer. This year, they’re opening themselves up to the possibility that no team makes a trade for McNabb and he returns to the field in September as the starting quarterback knowing that his entire organization doesn’t really want him to the be the starting quarterback. Is that any way to treat your franchise quarterback? Maybe it was the Eagles early exit from the playoffs this season, or maybe it’s McNabb’s frequent injuries that make the front office unsure if they can leave the team in his hands, but whatever it is, I’m sure there are better ways to go about this.

McNabb is still only 33 years old. He has played 11 seasons in the National Football League already and has suffered his fair share of bad injuries, but 33 isn’t that old, especially when it comes to the quarterback position. Peyton Manning turned 33 last month, and no one is going to argue that he’s even remotely close to being washed up. Both Kurt Warner and Brett Favre won playoff games last season at the ages of 38 and 40 respectively. In fact, Brett Favre came within one bad pass of playing in the Super Bowl.

Donovan McNabb still has a lot left in his tank as a quarterback in the NFL, whether or not he starts the 2010 season with the Philadelphia Eagles. If they ship him away for a draft pick in the next month, I will assure you that whatever team he does end up with will be competitive. Maybe not immediately, but he will have a noticeable impact, even if he ends up in Oakland. Yes, you read that right, I believe that Donovan McNabb can turn the Oakland Raiders into a playoff team.

As a Giants fan and someone who has been tortured by Donovan McNabb year in and year out, I’ll be honest and say that I won’t miss him if he leaves the NFC East. I would much rather face Kevin Kolb’s Eagles twice a year than Donovan McNabb’s Eagles (although in Kolb’s defense, we haven’t really seen much of him yet). Will the Giants-Eagles rivalry be a little different without No. 5? Of course it will, because even though I hate him twice a year, I look forward to Giants-Eagles games because of him, because I respect him just as much as I dislike him. And, if he can get the respect of a New York Giants fan, he certainly deserves the respect of his organization and his fans.





You Would Think I Don’t Even Watch Football

14 01 2010
Cincinnati Bengals v New York Jets

The NFL is an enigma. It’s not completely beyond comprehension, but it’s a lot harder to understand than baseball or even the NBA. Parity is one of the reason for this, but most of it stems from the fact that there are hundreds of mitigating factors that are in play every time two teams step on the field to do battle. Home field, momentum, teams with a chip on their shoulder, injuries, mistakes, rookie quarterbacks playing on the road, and coaches that don’t know how to properly manage the clock. These are only a few of the things that go into what ultimately decides every game in the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE, especially playoff games. The playoffs amplify everything by 100 and put every single flaw that a team may have under a microscope.

I’m not making excuses for myself. I went 0-for-4 in my picks last weekend. If you go back and read those picks after the fact you might even go as far as to assume that I don’t watch any football. Being completely an utterly wrong about each and every one of the Wild Card playoff games is not going to convince anyone that I actually watch 10+ hours of football every Sunday during the regular season. A person that watches 10+ hours of football every Sunday doesn’t go 0-for-4 in the first round of the playoffs.

But…this is the NFL, and in the NFL things like this happen in the first round of the playoffs:

1) A rookie quarterback, who looked like he was having a Chernobyl-like nuclear meltdown a few weeks ago, can win a road playoff game. By the way, this rookie quarterback is Mark Sanchez. Nevermind the fact that he’s now drawing eerie comparisons to Eli Manning’s breakout 2007 season in the New York media, this is the same Mark Sanchez who couldn’t muster more than 7 points at home against an Atlanta Falcons pass defense that was next to last in passing yards per game allowed.

2) The second-ranked overall defense will show up in Arizona and get torched for 51 points. Yes, 51 points. Even more ridiculous: the Cardinals scored 51 points and still needed overtime to beat the Packers.

3) Joe Flacco 33, Tom Brady 14. In Foxborough. To be honest with you, that’s a little misleading though, because Joe Flacco only threw for 36 yards on Sunday. That’s all. The Ravens beat the Pats 33-14, on the road, and their starting quarterback had 36 yards passing. How? Ray Rice, that’s how.

So, knowing that I not only embarrassed myself last week by going 0-for-4, but also lost my Super Bowl pick after the first round, I will put a unique twist on my picks of the Divisional Playoffs. I will pick the opposite of whatever my instinct tells me this week. That means that whatever I say in the next few paragraphs is the complete and total opposite of what my obviously flawed football intuition is telling me. This is a win/win situation, because if I go 0-for-4 again, it would mean my original instincts were correct. Try to stay with me here.

Saturday, 4:30 p.m.

Saints 33, Cardinals 27

There is no way that Kurt Warner has another game in him like the one he played against Green Bay last week. There is also no way that New Orleans is feeling a little out of sync after losing the last three games of the regular season. It doesn’t matter at all that their last convincing win came against the Patriots all the way back on November 30th. We’ve seen this happen year after year, number one seeds that sputter out towards the end of the regular season, but then rebound once the playoffs start. They are not in any danger of a hot team like the Cardinals coming in and stealing the game from them with an early ambush. Nope. Not in the NFL.

Saturday, 8:00 p.m.

Ravens 24, Colts 20

I forgot what the rule was — always bet against Peyton Manning in primetime games, right? I’m pretty sure that was it. Also, does anyone remember what happened to the Colts in the playoffs last year? They lost to the 8-8 Chargers who snuck into the playoffs by stealing the AFC West right out from under a reeling Broncos team (the Broncos are getting awfully good at tanking the second half of the season). So this is actually a no-brainer. The Ravens are coming off of a big win, Jim Caldwell is taking a ton of heat for pulling Manning against the Jets and Lucas Oil Stadium is not a difficult place for a young quarterback like Joe Flacco to win a road playoff game.

Sunday, 1:00 p.m.

Cowboys 41, Vikings 10

This game has stumped NFL analysts and ESPN’s talking heads all week. Nobody really knows how to pick this game. I do though. I know exactly who to pick. The Cowboys look like one of the hottest teams in the league right now and the Vikings don’t. Is it that simple? Apparently. Are you really going to make the mistake of backing Brett Favre in the playoffs at 40 years old? I dare you.

Sunday, 4:00 p.m.

Jets 27, Chargers 24  OT

You have to be a moron not to back Mark Sanchez on the road in the biggest game of his career against a team that’s won 11 games in a row. Seriously. Anyone who watches football, in fact anyone who even knows the definition of the word “football”, knows that the Jets will march in to Qualcomm Stadium on Sunday and their top-ranked defense will stifle the hottest team in football. I swear, sometimes this league is so easy to figure out.





Ready or Not, It’s Time for the Playoffs (And Why I Think The Packers Will Win It All)

5 01 2010
Green Bay Packers v Arizona Cardinals

Aside from the NCAA Tournament in March, the NFL Playoffs are probably my favorite postseason event in sports, even when the Giants aren’t playing. Do you want to know why I love the NFL Playoffs? If you don’t, just skip the next few sentences, because I’m going to tell you anyway. I love the NFL Playoffs because you get one chance, and that’s it. There are no best-of-5 series, there are no brutally long best-of-7 series that drag out for a week and a half. There is one game and one game only. If you’re unprepared, it will show. Typically in best-of-7 series, the team that is supposed to win, will win. In the NFL Playoffs, anything can happen. Often enough, anything does happen. That’s why I love the NFL Playoffs, because you can have a team like the 2008 Arizona Cardinals get hammered in Week 16 against the Patriots and lose by 40 points but then suddenly get hot at the right time and be in the Super Bowl a month later. I love the NFL Playoffs because a 10-6 wild-card team that everybody wrote off two months before can beat the number 1 and 2 seeds in the NFC in back-to-back weeks on the road and then stun an undefeated team to win the Super Bowl. Do I need to explain myself anymore?

If you’re getting deja vu from looking at the games slated for this weekend’s Wild Card playoff round, that’s because three out of the four match-ups are repeats from last week, and two of them are even being played on the same field. If I was the Elias Sports Bureau I would probably be able to tell you if that has ever happened before, but I don’t have those kinds of statistics in front of me, so for now I’m going to have to go out on a limb and guess that it is a pretty rare occurrence. Both the Packers and Eagles will return to the scene of the crime from Week 17 for a playoff rematch. The Packers easily handed the Cardinals a 33-7 loss in Glendale on Sunday, and will hope for a repeat performance this weekend. Meanwhile, the Eagles are hoping to actually show up in Arlington this Saturday night, because from what I saw they sure as hell didn’t show up on Sunday, losing 24-0 to the Cowboys and also losing out on a chance for the #2 seed in the NFC. In doing so, they dropped from the #3 seed all the way down to the #6 seed, ensuring that they will not have a home game in the playoffs. Going from possibly having a first-round bye and a home game in the Divisional round to being the #6 seed in the span of a few hours was probably just as disheartening for Eagles fans as remembering that they’ve lost 4 NFC title games in the last 7 years.

As for the Cardinals, I think we’ve all learned our lesson about writing off teams that look like a bunch of ghosts with uniforms on in Week 17. Last year’s Cardinals team taught us that lesson, and maybe they’re trying to reteach it again this year. All I know is that Sunday’s Packers-Cardinals game will certainly be a lot closer than 33-7.

So two exact, carbon-copy rematches from Week 17 in the first-round of the playoffs for the first time ever (yes, I’ve actually done the research now, so I can say that with confidence), and that’s just the NFC. What about the AFC? Well, there’s the remarkable story of the New York Jets. Even Rex Ryan wrote this team off a few weeks ago, but now they’re suddenly the toast of the town. How did this happen? I have no clue. I can take a shot in the dark though and attribute their sudden and inexplicable success to a few things:

1) Their cream puff of a schedule. The Jets won 9 games this year against Houston, New England, Tennessee, Oakland, Carolina, Buffalo, Tampa Bay, Indianapolis*, Cincinnati*. Three of those wins came against playoff teams, including Indy and Cincy in the last two weeks, but I’ll explain the asterisks in my next point.

2) They beat Indy and Cincy teams that were pretty much only on the field to collect a paycheck the last two weeks. Peyton Manning was out of the game by halftime in Week 16 allowing the Jets opportunistic defense to take advantage of a terrified Curtis Painter to the point where I was about to call DYFS on Jim Caldwell. And then on Sunday night, they trampled a Cincinnati team that clearly didn’t have any incentive to put on a show. I mean, Carson Palmer was 1/11 for 0 yards before being replaced by J.T. O’Sulli-beard. If those stats don’t scream, “The Football Felt Like a Frozen Brick, Somebody Give Me Coffee and Get Me Out of This Game Before Kimo Von Oelfhoffen Comes Out of Nowhere and Dives At My Knees”, then I don’t know what does.

3) Every single thing that the Jets needed to happen in the last two weeks in order to make the playoffs, happened.

But hey, I’m not bitter! So let’s move on to the next AFC Wild Card match-up featuring the New England Patriots and the Baltimore Ravens. Ironically, the Patriots, one of the only teams that I have been able to consistently figure out for the past 4 or 5 years is turning out to be the only team that I really don’t understand this season. Are they good? Are they a shell of their former selves? I can’t even tell anymore. However, if Wes Welker’s injury is as bad as they say it is (and they say it’s pretty bad, trust me), then I fear for New England. And if Tom Brady really has been playing with broken ribs for the last month like Bill Simmons says he has, then I fear for New England. I can see this game going either way though, it’s like the Tila Tequila of playoff games.

So, with all of that said, here are my Wild Card playoff predictions:

Saturday, 4:30 p.m. EST

Bengals 27, Jets 17

I didn’t watch all of Sunday night’s game, I’ll be honest. Most of what I got out of the game, I got from glancing over my shoulder at the TV while I sat at a blackjack table at Showboat. What I saw was this: J.T. O’Sullivan’s beard, Mark Sanchez not throwing many passes, really cold fans, Brad Smith, J.T. O’Sullivan’s beard, Mark Sanchez looking confused. Somehow it was 37-0. It’s going to be a whole different sequel in Cincinnati on Saturday with the Bengals hosting a playoff game in front of their home crowd for the first time since the 2006 playoffs when Kimo Von Oelhoffen simultaneously ended Carson Palmer’s season and the Bengals’ season on the second play from scrimmage.

Saturday, 8:30 p.m. EST

Eagles 31, Cowboys 23

You can’t say the same about the Eagles Week 17 performance as you could about the Bengals. The Eagles had a lot to play for, probably just as much as anyone else playing last week. They just didn’t show up, simply enough. Now, they have to avoid the dubious distinction of losing to the same team three times in one season, and twice in consecutive weeks. JerryWorld is going to be packed to the gills for it’s first playoff game and it’s going to be up to Donovan McNabb and DeSean Jackson to quiet the crowd and get the Eagles on the board early. If the Cowboys build an early lead like they did last week, it’s going to be Blitz City for the Dallas D and the Eagles injury-depleted offensive line.

Sunday, 1:00 p.m. EST

Patriots 20, Ravens 17

This game is going to be about how well the Patriots defense can calm down the Ravens potent two-headed beast at running back of Ray Rice and Willis McGahee and it’s also about how many times Randy Moss can get open against the Baltimore secondary. If Randy Moss has a big day, then so too will New England. I think that the Patriots should be able to get it done against the Ravens on Sunday, but with Welker gone and Brady not 100%, they’re going to have trouble after that, especially against San Diego and Indy, should it come to that.

Sunday, 4:00 p.m. EST

Packers 36, Cardinals 33

I like Aaron Rodgers and I like this Packers team just about as much as any other team in this year’s postseason. I have a good feeling about Green Bay and I think they’re one of the hottest teams in the league right now, and I love Donald Driver and Greg Jennings, and this Packers team is my playoff team for 2009. They seem to me like the most complete team in the NFC, and yes, even more so than the Saints. Their defense, the new 3-4 system implemented by Dom Capers this season, as proven to be effect as it’s one of the best in the league. Their balanced offense is a perfect fit for the gunslinging Aaron Rodgers, and I finally think that it’s time for a coming of age for A-Rod. Beating Brett Favre in the playoffs for a ticket to the NFC Championship is probably the sweetest justice he can have. As you can probably tell, I like the 2009 Green Bay Packers. I like them to beat Arizona on Sunday and then I like them to beat Brett Favre and the Vikings next week and then it’s on to DALLAS, OR PHILADELPHIA, OR NEW ORLEANS! THE PACKERS ARE GOING TO TAKE THEM ALL DOWN!

Since I’m already all worked up I just wanted to add one more paragraph about something that happened yesterday in the Giants organization that excited me more than anything else having to do with the Giants since Week 15: Defensive coordinator Bill Sheridan was fired. As I watched the latest 44-7 embarrassment this past Sunday in Minnesota, I hoped that Sheridan would be out no later than Monday, and I (along with most of Giants Nation, I would imagine) got my wish yesterday afternoon. So thank you, John Mara, for standing up for your fans and for being an owner with guts, and for doing what the Wilpons will probably never do: FIRE PEOPLE THAT CAN’T DO THEIR JOB (*cough* Omar Minaya *cough*).








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